Finished Individual Worth Value

I just finished the Personal Progress Individual Worth Value. 

Yippee!!!! 

I did not share many of the journal entries on this value because many of them were very personal.  

It was fun and my favorite part was the project.  It took us 12 hours to make and decorate around 23 mini cakes.  We researched how to do it and we picked a day; whew we had a long day!!  It was tough dealing with all the distractions that can come from having a big family.  My girls learned a lot and have more confidence in making cakes now.  We delivered the cakes to the people who ordered them from us.  The girls were able to go to Retreat For Girls with that money.  

I now have 4 more values to complete!  The goal date to finish is May 26 because that is the St. Y.W. Recognition Night.  I still think I can do this!!

I finished the Personal Progress Divine Nature Value
I am super excited!!  It was one of the busiest times of the year and I was able to finish some goals.  Yippee!!
The 10 hour project was to start a blog.  I started off with two and then condensed it down to one because it became to difficult.  I committed to writing one blog per week.  I have enjoyed it and I have had several people share their appreciation for them.  I hope it uplifts them as much as it does me.  I have decided to make a new goal and post every day.  I'll probably mostly have short posts and a weekly long one.  I have 3 articles that are scheduled to be published and that is fun for me.  I will share with you when they actually are.  Thanks for all the support I get from family and friends!!  I rely on you!

                            I am now working on the Individual Worth Value

Happy New Year and Revamping Our Goals

It's a new year and it's been wonderful to reassess.  
I love revamping!!

There is a wonderful article on lds.org  by President Thomas S. Monson that speaks of living the abundant life.  

http://lds.org/liahona/2012/01/living-the-abundant-life?lang=eng

  

I recommend this highly especially as you are taking the time to set new goals.
Speaking of goals I have just completed the second of 8 in the Personal Progress Manual.  I even accomplished the 10 hour project.  I'll write about the project soon but for now enjoy the article I wrote and combined with a previous post.  I actually sent it in to be published by the PowerofMoms website.  Wish me luck!
This article represents a focus that I hope to continue throughout the year!

“The phrase “working mother” is redundant”--Jane Sellman
I love this quote.  It expresses the truth that mothers give and give and give again.  Women are naturally nurturing and as mothers we are the most charitable example for our children to see.  As a mother I’m constantly looking for ways to improve so I took on a challenge. It read partly, “Make your home life better. For two weeks make a special effort to refrain from judging, criticizing, or speaking unkindly, and watch for positive qualities in that family member.”
I included part of my journal entries so you could read of my experience.

Monday, 5 December 2011  
My husband  is responsible for the safety culture at the company he works for.  He's very good at his job and has a good understanding of behavior based culture.  He will often times bring the same principles he uses at work to apply in our family.
He told me of the 4:1 rule suggested by Aubrey Daniels who is a psychologist and applies scientifically proven laws of human behavior in the workplace.
The 4:1 rule is 4 positive comments to 1 negative comment.
He told me in order to keep my relationship strong with my children then I should do this. I was told that the kids will not reap the benefit of the compliment if I don't show it that much more in comparison to the negative comment.
I have given this rule a name; “4:1 P.T. Cruiser”

Friday, 9 December 2011  I was going to correct one of my children and decided it was not the right time. I refrained and said something uplifting to her instead.  

Wednesday, 14 December 2011
The child that I refrained from correcting has just decided to do everyone’s laundry. What a huge blessing!
I have a few kids who have been surprising me with a cleaner kitchen. They even made me hot chocolate.
It's been better here, I think, than if I had not been focusing on it.
My husband and I have discussed the actions of our children that we believe are a direct result of the 4:1 P.T. Cruising. We hope to see even more results.
I've learned that it is sometimes better to hold off on a negative criticism in order to build a relationship.
Two of my oldest and I sat at the kitchen table talking, separately. It was nice for me and I think they appreciated the time also.

Tuesday, 3 January 2012 9:50 AM
I had an experience that was painful but I think has helped me and my eldest daughter’s relationship.  She told me that she preferred I didn't give her any compliment at all if I am going to turn around and tell her just the opposite. Her words stunned and frustrated me at the same time. I tried to think during her heated explanation what it was that I could have said that was in such contradiction.
Ugh!  
I had been trying to express to her that she is naturally obedient and that I appreciated it. Then true to her words the next day I told her that she needed to be more obedient to our family's attempts in establishing a morning routine.
ERG!!
She is not a morning person and doesn't like to eat breakfast or make lunch in the morning because of the lack of time she has and refuses to make it the night before because one time when she was younger she made a lunch and there were ants in it by morning.
She said she didn't like me yelling at her to eat breakfast or to make a lunch.  
We both ended up laughing at the absurdity of it all but I committed to not yelling at her to eat breakfast and make her lunch endlessly in the morning.
I also had a stipulation that in order for me to stop annoying her in the morning that she is to go see a nutritionist with me and her father.
I have been true to my promise and our relationship has improved.  

You can see that the challenge I took on has helped me be more deliberate as a mother in the things I speak.  
I often look to my mother for an example. She has many wonderful qualities but the one that has stood out to me the clearest is how tender she is with others.
She has always encouraged us children to look at the other person's point of view. I remember being shocked when the one time she said anything negative about someone was to say that that person was being judgmental towards her and that it bothered her.
I think of this nursery rhyme that hung on my mom's bedroom wall while I grew up!!

I added a verse for mothers

What are little boys made of?

Snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails

That's what little boys are made of!"

What are little girls made of?

"Sugar and spice and all things nice

That's what little girls are made of!"

What are mommies made of?

Charity Untold and everything Gold

That's what mommies are made of!!

I know as a mother it is extremely tough to meet all the needs of our family; pushing the positive talk to the back of our mind and thus tarnishing the gold that we are made of.  I have two suggestions for mothers in order to shine our charitable characteristics and revel in the beauty of the gold.
1.  Love yourself.  
Understand who you are and what you need, taking the time to meet them.  Give back to yourself, keeping your gold buffed and shiny.  
2.  Be a 4:1 P.T. (positive talk) Cruiser
Be deliberate in the way you speak to your family.  4 compliments to 1 correction or negative will shift the atmosphere in your relationships.  You can cruise over the bumps in the road by being a 4:1 P.T. Cruiser.  You will enjoy the improvements in your mothering and your family will hear more compliments and will naturally try harder to be the people they need to be.     

Do you understand what you are made of?  Charity untold and everything gold?
I challenge you to be a 4:1 P.T. Cruiser and watch the love shift into high gear.

Happy New Year!!